These were my thoughts about Tim's class at Screenwriting Expo, Breaking the Story. Just pulling them all together in one spot instead of broken into several posts. Forgive spelling, grammar, and general brainsplooge.



Okay. So Tim wore jeans, a blue shirt, and a sort of tweed kind of jacket. And his new glasses which frame his face well. The Manolo, he would have approved of Tim's Bruno Magli shoes.

John picked us up. I went through the gate. I can't tell you what I saw, as a non-disclosure agreement pops out of the code box and you have to sign it before entering.

On the way, Tim said, "so what am I doing?" a whole lot. Then we got to the thing, and the conference people treated my like I Was Very Important. The tables had turned. I could make insane demands, and they would have bent to my will. I did not take advantage of this.

Oh, this isn't about me. Right.

So the thing started after two people molested Tim with a mike wire thing and I was like, OMG SO JEALOUS.

There was about 250 people there. We saw that they all had these little sheets to grade Tim's performance, and John snapped, "DO NOT TELL HIM ABOUT THAT UNTIL AFTER."

Okey dokey, then.

Tim started the class by explaining a bit about story breaking and asking for a show of hands for which show they'd like to break. It was a pretty even vote between Firefly and Angel, so Tim suggested a crossover in which Mal and Angel fuck.

I would like to state here for the record, that Tim stole that idea from me.

But they decided to break an Angel. Tim took suggestions from the class, and shot people down gently, explained why, and moved on. It took about an hour to get the theme, and write the teaser.

The plot was to occur during season 2 of Angel, and it was decided that Phantom Dennis would become corporeal taking the form of Cordy's Dream Man (sort of like the episode when Jan made up George Glass on the Brady Bunch) and get to romance her for one day.

Lots and lots of audience participation involving a sound guy running around with a microphone. Tim, who ordinarily is honeypie, played a sadistic game of choosing a raised hand from the far left, then the front right. Eventually, the guy with the mike said, "I HATE you" into the mike, and then ge was broken and people just yelled suggestions.

Tim ran it like a real writer's room, only about 4 notches kinder, and they managed to break the teaser and two acts before he took questions.

He spilled a sooper seekrit plot that never came to be on Firefly, and talked about Joss humping a couch. This will be available on the extended version of the DVD.

At the end, Tim went outside to smoke, and about two dozen hopeful writers surrounded him and John and just stared at them. Which was skeery and I thought that they were going to kill them and drink their blood, but then I just realized it was awe, and they started asking a lot of questions.

I passed a note to John during the Q&A, when Tim was being HUGELY charming and the whole audience wanted to lick his brain:

When he does this, I get a terrible crush. He's adorable.

There was a girl outside GUSHING on a cell about talking to Tim. SO CUTE. That was me once. SAD.

And you know what? Tim? Really good teacher. He explained things really well, and people were raising their hands pitching some great ideas for the story the entire time.

He didn't pull a lot of punches and was honest with them without crushing anyone, I think. Which I think is difficult in a room full of people that so wanted to impress him, and he would have to say, "No, that isn't this, and here's why."

I actually learned an assload in between worrying if he was hungry or getting tired.

There was sort of a running joke at the end, when students asked about spec scripts, and if it's okay to spec something that isn't on the air. Tim said probably not, choose a show that is fresh but not another Veronica Mars or Sopranos, since there are thousands of them.

He suggested writing something like an I Love Lucy, if you're spec-ing for a half hour comedy. It's unusual and will get pulled from the pile. Especially if it's an hour long I Love Lucy where she gets an abortion.

Later, he said it'd be even better if it were an I Love Lucy where she gets an abortion...and it lives.

And was at this point that it occured to me, and I'll whitefont so Tim can't see...Firstly, this is something I realized long ago, that it seemed that writers and sometimes fans, are incredibly intimidated by Tim. And I never really understood the why of it, because I don't feel at all intimidated. All the people I love in my life were love at first sight people. First time I met Jesse, I was just all, "I love her and she will be my friend until we die." Seriously. It's not a large circle, but there's a click in my "oh, I just love you" center and that is that. And that's what happened when I me Tim, Kat, lori, all those people. So, never any intimidation.

But I've seen it with mine own eyes, and someone yesterday said to me that he feels like his IQ immediately drops 10% when he opens his mouth to talk to Tim, and it's all about, "I'm talking to someone so much smarter, funnier than I will ever be." In a room full of writers who haven't quite gotten anywhere, yet, and wanted to learn how to get there, Tim was who they all wanted to be (well, not so much Tim, but his career, I guess), so that adds some amount of wistful awe, of course.

But then there's the Tim of it. He's so lovely, breezy, and so fucking quick-witted that there was a sort of need to impress coming from some folk. Plus, when the class was stuck and couldn't move forward, Tim would just toss something gently out and say, "what if we do this?" And then the room would break into delighted laughter and applause as he pulled the story forward a little at a time. Most of the class would be stuck (which is to be expected, not that they were dumb, they all asked really smart questions) and he just sort of did it in a way that was as natural and easy as ita landing a kick, Kat raising an eyebrow, or lori putting together Ikea furniture. It sort of reminded me of the way msbelle will throw her head back and laugh out loud. The way he just pulled the breaks out was startling and natural all at the same time.

And this is something that so many people found difficult. And for Tim it was like a sneeze, completely one of those physical reactions that you can't even help. He acts like it's not rare at all, that it's nothing, and I think probably because despite his protestations to the contrary, that it is as simple as a sneezing, or giggling when someone tickles you. It all just propelled out of Tim's head and on the whiteboard and it was effortless. That's what talent is, and he's got it in spades. And maybe that's a little intimidating, but mostly it just made people want to be around him, even if they couldn't say anything, hoping that maybe they'd catch a little of it, like it's pixie dust.

I was just terribly proud and more than a little honored that this guy calls me a friend, even though I tease him mercilessly. It sounds all terribly ass-kissy, I'm sure, but that's not where I'm coming from. I'm just so fucking proud of this person I adore. I'm gushing, yeah? I'll stop. He'll be so embarassed. Good thing he can't read the whitefont


And that was that.